You know what I really like? Things that look like other things, but are actually different things. Such as this van which is actually a tent and this cup of hot chocolate which is actually a cupcake. But the best thing is this: a wardrobe which conceals a secret playroom. Compared to the father who created this, the rest of us are merely cardboard cut-outs of parents whose children should regard them with justified contempt and scorn.
This Wicked Witch of the West bookmark is definitely a thing I would like to own, as is this flying superhero kite thing. And maybe some angel wings for my iPhone. But cool as this squirming umbilical cord phone charger is, I think I just want to admire it from afar. Far afar.
You know what else I like? Soft toy versions of everything. Such as the Plush Zombie, and My First Bacon, and Plush Sushi, and a plush Beating Heart that actually beats. And oh God you can buy plush roadkill. The internet has reached a new… something. Low? High? I can’t tell any more.