Archive for tasty virtual flies

Skull bunnies, zombie Peeps and the Eggbot: Easter links

Easter! Time of chocolate, pastel-coloured items and… some religious stuff that is less related to chocolate. In honour of the occasion, have some links to demonstrate the very soul of the season.

- For your basic scary rabbit needs, I recommend Fork Party’s gallery of terrifying Easter Bunnies (complete with children caught at the exact moment their lifelong rabbit phobia took hold). I also give you this, a soft toy rabbit with a skull for a face and, most weirdly, a natty tie to complete the nightmarish look.

I would eat your face, except someone already did that to me.

- Speaking of bunnies, you know how at Easter, they give birth to chocolate eggs, in defiance of all natural laws? Little-known fact: when the eggs hatch, twin baby dragons emerge. And eat you. Probably.

- Oh, and you know how at Easter, giant rabbits hunt you down with sad yet hungry faces? True story.

- We don’t really have Peeps in the UK, which is a shame, because they make great film tableaus. If you don’t wake up in the night screaming about the Walking Peeps coming to eat your tasty chocolate brains, then… um, good for you, I guess.

- Looking for ways to decorate eggs? Meet lEGGo, light-up eggs, steampunk eggs and the Eggbot. Or just admire this collection. The Dalek is especially cool.

- And finally, the obligatory Easter-is-satanic link. Did you know human sacrifices are performed throughout the Easter Holidays? No… me neither. *hides corpses*. Still, at least it isn’t April 19th yet.

 

Look at their delicious dead eyes.

Toygers, invisible art, and face emoticons

Links! Which are, as always, connected by nothing more than the fact that I like them.

- What should I read next? you may ask yourself, on the occasion of finishing a book. This website answers your question based on existing reader data. I tried it with a couple of favourites and it recognised them and offered reasonable-looking suggestions.

- If you see Einstein, you don’t need glasses. If you see Marilyn Monroe, you do. That’s really all you need to know.

- Cats bred to look like tiny tigers. Can we have tiny lions next? Then I want budgies that resemble cute little mini vultures. I have my reasons.

Handy pocket size, and they probably won't eat your face.

- Once people read books. Welcome to the new world, where they function as technology accessories. (OK, I kind of want this.)

- Like baths? Like boats? You’re going to want to see this.

- Notebook full of photos of New York walls for you to draw on, so you can pretend to be a street artist. Nice.

- I know this is incredibly easy to mock, but I quite like living in a world where someone will pay money for works of art that only exist in the artist’s head.

- Emotion-enhancing glasses, on the the other hand, are just silly. But kind of appealing. Maybe.

- And if your appetite for Things off the Internet remains unsated, try these Simple Ideas That Are Borderline Genius.

Trawling the net for fatherly fish

Father’s Day is a week on Sunday and I’m going to use that fact as a vague way to tie together the fun things I’ve found on the net recently. Such as this tiny yet functional firearm, for the elf-sized gangster in your family. Or for particularly realistic games of toy soldiers.

schroedingers cat

Or teeshirts! Everyone likes teeshirts. I especially like ‘end-head-start body‘, ‘Polar Bears are Soluble in Water‘, and ‘Look Out Schroedinger’s Cat, It’s a Trap!’

Or if you know a father with an exuberant Hercule Poirot-style moustache, why not make him a meal consisting entirely of moustache-shaped food using this mould?

Alternatively, these Dr Who papercraft kits will please any dextrous Whovians in your life. In the further realm of things I didn’t previously know you could buy are these miniature football stadiums (stadia?) for, er, about £80 each, and these amazing escaping light bulbs. Or who wouldn’t want a bouquet of flowers in the shape of a puppy?

If you’re extremely rich and/or eccentric, you could knit this dwarf helmet and beard (ok, maybe not before next Sunday), commission a Pirates of the Caribbean-themed movie theatre for $2.5 million (seriously, wow – or the Batman one?) or create some reverse graffiti if you know of any nearby very dirty walls. Or draw scenes from his favourite movie on your eyelids. Or buy his child this mech warrior. Fine, I’ve strayed a little from my stated theme but I’m just trying to get in all the cool things I found. And now I have.

Also useful as a handy disguise

Umbilical phone chargers and plush roadkill

You know what I really like? Things that look like other things, but are actually different things. Such as this van which is actually a tent and this cup of hot chocolate which is actually a cupcake. But the best thing is this: a wardrobe which conceals a secret playroom. Compared to the father who created this, the rest of us are merely cardboard cut-outs of parents whose children should regard them with justified contempt and scorn.

This Wicked Witch of the West bookmark is definitely a thing I would like to own, as is this flying superhero kite thing. And maybe some angel wings for my iPhone. But cool as this squirming umbilical cord phone charger is, I think I just want to admire it from afar. Far afar.

You know what else I like? Soft toy versions of everything. Such as the Plush Zombie, and My First Bacon, and Plush Sushi, and a plush Beating Heart that actually beats. And oh God you can buy plush roadkill. The internet has reached a new… something. Low? High? I can’t tell any more.

Further tasty virtual flies from the Web

- These toy photography pictures are very pretty. I think most people who possess both toys and camera must have tried this (or at least I have: see picture).

A toy lion at a festival

My pet lion at the Big Chill festival

Be your Own Souvenir. Who doesn’t want a tiny plastic army version of themselves?

- Oh wow, little paper record players as wedding invitations.

- Now that we know you can hack traffic lights, I foresee many more instances of this, and possibly the collapse of the traffic light system, probably followed by the collapse of civilisation as we know it. The link, by the way, may not be worksafe, depending on how your work feels about pictures of little green electric people copulating.

- Lacking though my hands are in the ability to make small exquisite cupcakes, I still appreciate the fact that other people can do it. These topiary ones are lovely, the rainbow ones appeal to my inner rainbow, and the steampunk ones – well, if the phrase ‘steampunk cupcakes’ doesn’t make you want to grim maniacally, then clearly you’re not me.

I can’t believe I’m saying this, but: non-worksafe video of Creme Eggs having sex. Happy Easter.

- And finally, what I believe is the obligatory kitten link: Parenting is Thoroughly Sisyphean

Fresh tasty virtual flies from the Web

I agree: it is wrong and disturbing that cartoon teeth have teeth themselves.

I am inordinately pleased that seminal gay film Prick Up Your Ears is on the chart of Films With Four or More Harry Potter Wizards In Them.

It is quite clear to me that the Mirrorcube treehouse is the coolest hotel room in the history of people paying to stay in rooms.

I did not know leprechaun trap cakes were a thing, but I wholeheartedly approve. Next step: a giant version of this cake that I can actually fall into and dig my way out of. Please.

‘Who’s buying the £1,300 horse hoof shoes?’ I think the answer has to be: very rich furries. It’s a niche market but clearly one well worth appealing to.

Comfort food is comforting. Who knew?(I’m being flippant. It is important to do studies even on things that seem obvious.)

The Brain Is Not An Explanation

Tasty virtual flies from the Web

  • Seriously, John Cusack has never been nominated for an Oscar? Not just never won one, never been nominated? Jim Carrey? Steve Buscemi? Mia Farrow? Gary Oldman? This is frankly bizarre. I vote we start our own Oscars, because the official lot are clearly getting it wrong.
  • It’s fairly clear that Charlie Sheen is having a nervous breakdown of some kind and therefore possibly shouldn’t be mocked quite as much as he has been. My only excuse for this link, therefore, is that it features the cutest baby sloths you will ever see. (The site also has ‘things Charlie Sheen has said presented by bunnies’ and ‘things Mel Gibson has said presented by kittens’ but the latter is genuinely horrible, though the kittens are gorgeous. But you can find gorgeous kittens on roughly half of all webpages, so don’t feel obliged to suffer.)
  • 12 Pieces of Geek Jewellery. You would not believe how many people I know who would walk over diamond-encrusted coals for that necklace with the digits of pi on it. Also, I would just like to say that the word ‘nerdalicious’ is adorable.